Sadly Leaving the Fold.

EmilysDad

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He found a job in a restaurant as a KP and worked his way up to commi chef, he's now jacked that in and gone back to Uni (Open), studying computers now, 'coz he doesn't like getting his hands all grungy, be it with car oil, bodyshop catty, or foodstuffs. :eek: :mad:

I was ready to kill him again at this point as, we will be subsidising him AGAIN, children, who'd have 'em? :mad:
I'd have another Emily ... her brother though could go for a very long walk off a short plank. He sounds not dissimilar to yours .. he put the minimum effort in at school but managed to get a load of GCSE passes. Went into the Navy as a WAFU apprentice & tried to get through with the same minimum effort which obviously didn't work and was out on his heels within maybe 6 months. His mate got him a job in a pub/restaurant and he's not progressed any further from that.
 
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Jimbo1959

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I'd have another Emily ... her brother though could go for a very long walk off a short plank. He sounds not dissimilar to yours .. he put the minimum effort in at school but managed to get a load of GCSE passes. Went into the Navy as a WAFU apprentice & tried to get through with the same minimum effort which obviously didn't work and was out on his heels within maybe 6 months. His mate got him a job in a pub/restaurant and he's not progressed any further from that.

With my lad, if, and it's the proverbial big, IF, he gets good results from the course he can go forward and potentially do very well for himself.

I think he's competing with his girlfriend this time, who's an ambitious, smart, lovely girl. I just hope he doesn't *uck it up.

I want him to do well but, he needs to realise that Mum and Dad are getting on and won't always be here to subsidise him. Plus with our families health/genetic history time could run out awfully fast, like within the next couple of years if we're unlucky.

It's a shame because he's basically quite a nice lad, just a bit "entitled" imho. Fingers crossed. :)
 

Blobcat

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My eldest just received the below :)
Well on the way to earning more than I ever will... I might even get my smart car back... :rolleyes:

03A3E7ED-6BBF-4742-8F30-70F5C3771F6A.jpeg
 

Steve@Avantgarde

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The best help I ever had from my father was no help at all. He always supported me in any decision I wanted to take and offered his advice and opinion but opened no doors himself, even when he possibly could.

When I said I wanted to fix cars for a living he said, are you sure? You cant even be bothered or have the patience to fix your own bike! That was almost the fire to prove him wrong!

He made me work extra to buy my first car, although he did help me with the insurance, when it came to buying my first house there was no help from a deposit (mainly beacuse he didnt have it..!!) , but lots of financial advice instead.

Essentially I was from a very working class background with came with the ethos of if you want it, earn it and if you cant afford it, you dont have it. I'm glad I had that, its helped me immensely in business, made me shrewed when making decisions (most of the time) and instilled a working ethos in to me that I rarely see in people of my generation let alone the one afterward.
 

Frontstep

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You have to help your child to get the job they want.
Whatever it is,
my contacts like many range widely but not at any significant level in his preferred area.
He is like many working his way through the covid University restrictions but is still on course for a good degree in a useful subject.
Its constant zoom interviews at the moment and he will spend a few days researching on each.
He is getting through the first three levels of interview, application,tests and recorded questions.
Where he has got past these he has had some initial live interviews.
This is all for an internship.
Its certainly not easy.
 

Blobcat

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The best help I ever had from my father was no help at all. He always supported me in any decision I wanted to take and offered his advice and opinion but opened no doors himself, even when he possibly could.

When I said I wanted to fix cars for a living he said, are you sure? You cant even be bothered or have the patience to fix your own bike! That was almost the fire to prove him wrong!

He made me work extra to buy my first car, although he did help me with the insurance, when it came to buying my first house there was no help from a deposit (mainly beacuse he didnt have it..!!) , but lots of financial advice instead.

Essentially I was from a very working class background with came with the ethos of if you want it, earn it and if you cant afford it, you dont have it. I'm glad I had that, its helped me immensely in business, made me shrewed when making decisions (most of the time) and instilled a working ethos in to me that I rarely see in people of my generation let alone the one afterward.
I think my parents went to the same school... yours reads similar to mine (apart from I don't repair cars for a living,)
 

Blobcat

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You have to help your child to get the job they want.
Whatever it is,
my contacts like many range widely but not at any significant level in his preferred area.
He is like many working his way through the covid University restrictions but is still on course for a good degree in a useful subject.
Its constant zoom interviews at the moment and he will spend a few days researching on each.
He is getting through the first three levels of interview, application,tests and recorded questions.
Where he has got past these he has had some initial live interviews.
This is all for an internship.
Its certainly not easy.
My position was made redundant Sept 2019... I had 3 zoom interviews in early 2020 and started my new position in June 2020. It's tough but there is work out there, you've just got to be determined and "getting a job" is a "full time job"
 

Frontstep

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My position was made redundant Sept 2019... I had 3 zoom interviews in early 2020 and started my new position in June 2020. It's tough but there is work out there, you've just got to be determined and "getting a job" is a "full time job"
It is, and thankfully he has the work ethic deeply ingrained.
He is even adding German to his toolkit.
The area he is going for is extroadinarily competitive and most fail at the first fence or two.
Luckily his girl friend also has the work ethic and is German !!
 

A.J.

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My position was made redundant Sept 2019... I had 3 zoom interviews in early 2020 and started my new position in June 2020. It's tough but there is work out there, you've just got to be determined and "getting a job" is a "full time job"

Precisely, there is work out there for those who want it and are prepared to make the extra effort to make the grade :)
 

Steve@Avantgarde

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I think my parents went to the same school... yours reads similar to mine (apart from I don't repair cars for a living,)
I think it was the time they grew up in when there was no nanny state (thank you labour :rolleyes:) that my generation has taken advantage of, there was an ethos of an honest days pay for an honest days hard work, and nothing was ever provided for you on a plate. If you had been given an opportunity it was because you worked hard to earn it.

Its the polar opposite today where social media has created an idealistic image of what life should be like, such as hanging off yachts with glasses of dom perrigon, claiming how easily they say they have earned it or whats been gifted to them via the cervix lottery.

As a result the young uns think that is actual real life and no one can be bothered to teach them otherwise.
 

Jim2

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Compared to the world I grew up in, the present one is foreign. Basically, same as other posters have experienced..you wanted something, you worked for it..the difference between right and wrong were stark, and known by all. You crossed the line, you paid the price. It was harder in many ways, and a lot of things have improved, but at the expense of good values being lost. So much confusion around..even the definition of the sexes is now in dispute..so crazy world.
 

Wighty

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Whilst reading this I’ve just realised my silver spoon tastes funny , maybe the coating is wearing off . Just browsing for the best debt/credit card management at the moment :) .
I hate hard work even when someone else does it :rolleyes:
 
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Jimbo1959

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The best help I ever had from my father was no help at all. He always supported me in any decision I wanted to take and offered his advice and opinion but opened no doors himself, even when he possibly could.

When I said I wanted to fix cars for a living he said, are you sure? You cant even be bothered or have the patience to fix your own bike! That was almost the fire to prove him wrong!

He made me work extra to buy my first car, although he did help me with the insurance, when it came to buying my first house there was no help from a deposit (mainly beacuse he didnt have it..!!) , but lots of financial advice instead.

Essentially I was from a very working class background with came with the ethos of if you want it, earn it and if you cant afford it, you dont have it. I'm glad I had that, its helped me immensely in business, made me shrewed when making decisions (most of the time) and instilled a working ethos in to me that I rarely see in people of my generation let alone the one afterward.
I think my parents went to the same school... yours reads similar to mine (apart from I don't repair cars for a living,)
My position was made redundant Sept 2019... I had 3 zoom interviews in early 2020 and started my new position in June 2020. It's tough but there is work out there, you've just got to be determined and "getting a job" is a "full time job"
Compared to the world I grew up in, the present one is foreign. Basically, same as other posters have experienced..you wanted something, you worked for it..the difference between right and wrong were stark, and known by all. You crossed the line, you paid the price. It was harder in many ways, and a lot of things have improved, but at the expense of good values being lost. So much confusion around..even the definition of the sexes is now in dispute..so crazy world.

These four "statements" sum up my life, work ethic and attitude.

I have worked hard all my life, the highest level I ever got to at work was middle management before a near death accident meant that I was no longer able to function at that level anymore. I had to recover from brain damage which included, loss of feeling down my right side, partial sight loss and the loss of intellect and reasoning capability and just as I was getting back on my feet, I got kicked over again when it was discovered I must have quadruple heart by pass surgery to survive.

I have never let anything get in my way, if I wanted "it" badly enough, I worked my ass off to get it. I was determined to get my health back and did everything I could to achieve it. Five years of hell followed, first, getting over the motor cycle accident which had caused the brain damage and associated issues, then, adapting to a new way of living to assist the recovery from the heart by pass surgery. I did it though, I wasn't going to be a waster or a sponger from the state.

I think too many folk now-a-days have the "entitled" attitude, sadly, that way lies only heartache and misery for their friends, family and parents. As many have said, "if you want it you need to work for it."

It makes me so angry when I see youngsters waste their lives trying to live their lives like something out of a fairy story, one that their parents ultimately pay for.

My wife and I have tried very hard to set our two a good example of work ethic, money management and attitude to achievement, consequently our oldest lad, together with his partner, have just bought their first house, both hard workers and still in their early twenties, I'm very proud of them both.

Our wee fella I think has been coddled a little too much by comparison, however, if he works hard and applies himself and his plans go ahead as he hopes, he will do well for himself. I hope that works out for him. (Dad the softie gets in the way sometimes, lol).
 
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Jimbo1959

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I hate hard work even when someone else does it :rolleyes:

So says the man who has done more preventative maintenance on his own car than almost anyone else I know has done on their own car.

You just love to work Wighty, tell the truth, you're a product of your upbringing. :D
 

Jim2

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So says the man who has done more preventative maintenance on his own car than almost anyone else I know has done on their own car.

You just love to work Wighty, tell the truth, you're a product of your upbringing. :D
Ah, I would have to disagree a bit with you there Jimbo. For Wighty, that's not even remotely like work..its his very relaxing and enjoyable hobby .
 

Wighty

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So says the man who has done more preventative maintenance on his own car than almost anyone else I know has done on their own car.

You just love to work Wighty, tell the truth, you're a product of your upbringing. :D
I was a bit tongue in cheek , yes I know what a hard days work is , that’s why I try and avoid it now . @Jim2 got it right with car work being enjoyable rather than work .
 

Jim2

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These four "statements" sum up my life, work ethic and attitude.

I have worked hard all my life, the highest level I ever got to at work was middle management before a near death accident meant that I was no longer able to function at that level anymore. I had to recover from brain damage which included, loss of feeling down my right side, partial sight loss and the loss of intellect and reasoning capability and just as I was getting back on my feet, I got kicked over again when it was discovered I must have quadruple heart by pass surgery to survive.

I have never let anything get in my way, if I wanted "it" badly enough, I worked my ass off to get it. I was determined to get my health back and did everything I could to achieve it. Five years of hell followed, first, getting over the motor cycle accident which had caused the brain damage and associated issues, then, adapting to a new way of living to assist the recovery from the heart by pass surgery. I did it though, I wasn't going to be a waster or a sponger from the state.

I think too many folk now-a-days have the "entitled" attitude, sadly, that way lies only heartache and misery for their friends, family and parents. As many have said, "if you want it you need to work for it."

It makes me so angry when I see youngsters waste their lives trying to live their lives like something out of a fairy story, one that their parents ultimately pay for.

My wife and I have tried very hard to set our two a good example of work ethic, money management and attitude to achievement, consequently our oldest lad, together with his partner, have just bought their first house, both hard workers and still in their early twenties, I'm very proud of them both.

Our wee fella I think has been coddled a little too much by comparison, however, if he works hard and applies himself and his plans go ahead as he hopes, he will do well for himself. I hope that works out for him. (Dad the softie gets in the way sometimes, lol).
As the Americans in the cotton belt say " You sure got a tough row to hoe ". But fair dues, each time you got knocked down, you picked your self up, dusted yourself off, and started again. We have massive problems with youths presently, not all, but still far too many. And this is the fault of the parents primarily, ( who probably had the same background themselves) anti social behaviour being the normal. We have 2 boys and 2 girls, who are now parents themselves, with good jobs,each has their own home, and are doing well. Even in their school days, they all had part time jobs, same as I had at the same stage in life. Work ethnic was instilled in them from an early age, and now I'm happy to see the eldest grandkids following the same path. Sure they have an "entitled " attitude ..you want something? You are perfectly entitled to work for it. Kudos to you Jimbo, I hope that life is treating you better nowadays
 
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Jimbo1959

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Ah, I would have to disagree a bit with you there Jimbo. For Wighty, that's not even remotely like work..its his very relaxing and enjoyable hobby .

I agree Jim but, I couldn't resist a little gentle teasing of someone with a great work ethic. :D:D
 
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Jimbo1959

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As the Americans in the cotton belt say " You sure got a tough row to hoe ". But fair dues, each time you got knocked down, you picked your self up, dusted yourself off, and started again. We have massive problems with youths presently, not all, but still far too many. And this is the fault of the parents primarily, ( who probably had the same background themselves) anti social behaviour being the normal. We have 2 boys and 2 girls, who are now parents themselves, with good jobs,each has their own home, and are doing well. Even in their school days, they all had part time jobs, same as I had at the same stage in life. Work ethnic was instilled in them from an early age, and now I'm happy to see the eldest grandkids following the same path. Sure they have an "entitled " attitude ..you want something? You are perfectly entitled to work for it. Kudos to you Jimbo, I hope that life is treating you better nowadays

I agree whole heartedly with every word you wrote there Jim and I'm pleased to see that both generations of your offspring are following the right path (to like minded people anyway, lol), I don't know exactly where folk are going wrong these days, personally I blame TV, however, I think that there is not enough discipline and I don't mean battering lumps out of your kids before anyone has a go, I mean setting rules and boundaries and sticking to and enforcing (not the right word but the only one which I can think of that fits) them.

As regards your comment " I hope that life is treating you better nowadays" thank you very much. All I will say (don't want to temp fate as they say) is "So far so good."

With the minor exception of our kitchen being a bomb site for the past two months due to lock down rules meaning no one can work in it without being on the receiving end of a humongous fine, whisper it.... Life's been good. Thank you.
 


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